I graduated college last week and I’m currently living at my parent’s house until I move into an apartment in my college town this summer. I’ve never written into an advice column before and I’m nervous to do so but here goes nothing. Enjoy the newness of people and be open to possibility and chance. Take a chance-it’s like dating without the heartbreak. Find them-and that means following up on friendships, a step beyond the activity group and fitness class. That person will come with a ready-made group. You never know who it’s going to be! But it’s that person who always has people over, or brings birthday presents, or goes to quiz night at the pub, and always a person who keeps up friendships. What you need to find is a Nexus: a person from whom more friends will come. She has also lived abroad, with very mixed results you may find your fond memories of connection have more to do with single life and youth than people more “conducive to getting deep.” Prudie has found it is harder to make friends in one’s late-30s than in one’s late-20s there are numerous reasons (children, partners, jobs, health issues) but rarely a failure to connect. I am not sure whether I should just suggest we move somewhere else (we don’t need my income and I could probably find an acceptable position in many other places) or if that is avoiding a necessary reckoning with his behavior?Īh, this sounds heartbreaking! And yet all too familiar. I wanted to do some renovations on our house, and he brought in a team for three months from the town where we spend summers. Now he and our kids visit the doctor and dentist on trips back to our previous hometown. He also refuses to trust the expertise of anyone here, after an experience where our new pediatrician refused to do some tests on our son my husband asked for based on his own hunch, which turned out to be correct. Elsewhere, he is his usual delightful self.
Going very much against character, he now seems to go out of his way to use the force of his intellect to humiliate people here. He has not had a smooth adjustment and says that he is bothered at how the people here seem to think highly of their own intelligence and abilities but are incompetent. We moved, for my job (for the second time-so it is not that he has any problem moving for my career), to a small city/large town in a new region.
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